Tuesday, 25 August 2015

Writing portfolio sample

Description:in writing I have been doing idea my goal was to plan.
This is my story:

This is my plan:

                         
                               The big mission 

"What" a cat in a cage and a bird out. 

So how do you did a cat get in the cage.

So the Owner had just let the bird out and left the room but there was a cat in the room the bird did not like the cat.

So the yellow bird had just rigged the cage up to the roof with some fraying rope it was very weak and then she put some old smelly tuna underneath the cat came over and started to eat the tuna the bird cut the rope and bang the cat was stuck.

Then the dog walked in because he wanted to chase the cat but the cat was in the cage so he couldn't but nothing would stop the dog. So the dog walked up to the bird but the bird was up for a fight the dog got a big scratch down its face so he ran away into his dog kennel.

The dog was a spy so he went into his own house the door was the bottom of his dog kennel 
He put on all of his spy gear and got ready. He went into the room next to the room with the bird and the cat in it so got out his grappling hook gun and shot it up onto the roof and then he pulled himself up onto the roof.Then he put on his suction gloves on and pulled himself over to the manhole that took you up in to the air vents he slide to the manhole that dropped into the room with the bird and the cat in it. 

He dropped into the room and knocked out the little yellow bird and he fried up the bird and then the cat and the dog started to eat it up and they lived happily ever after....

Evaluation: I think need to plan to put Moro describing words in.


Feedback/Feedforward you have done a good job describing what happened in the story but you could have put more describing words in there #Thomas

5 comments:

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  4. i like your plan because its got the picture of the bird and the labes ans well. i like your story aswell because its funny and interresting

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  5. Hunter, what a well thought out piece of writing! I wish I could see your mountain plan to see if the ideas came from your planning or as you wrote. I love that you were so precise and focused with your story and that you stuck to the main points. You had great detail that made it easy for the reader to know exactly what was happening. Keep up the great work!

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